I hit rock bottom at the dentist.
Went in to check a cracked molar. Thought it’d be a quick fix. Instead, the dentist said my front crowns are too old, there’s a visible gap between my real and fake teeth, and my bite is off. The fix? NT$70,000 (AUD $3,500) for the front. NT$26,000 (AUD $1,300) for the back. And if I want to correct the bite? NT$240,000 (AUD $12,000).
I stared at him, half-laughing, half-panicking. Like… what?
That night I couldn’t sleep. My eyes were blurry from staring at the computer until midnight. I was googling bite correction exercises, asking my dear AI bot questions, trying to figure out if I had to spend that much or if there was another way. I didn’t want to make another expensive mistake.
And then, just to top it off…
A few days ago, I picked up a new pair of glasses. My vision’s been off for a while.
The optometrist reminded me: “Oh, it’s just the start. You might need three pairs of glasses after 50.”
It wasn’t just about the teeth.
It was the body wearing down.
It was the money anxiety.
It was thinking about that time I was in the hospital and no one came to visit me.
It was the quiet loneliness.
The not knowing how to make money without a job.
And yeah, I even spiraled into comparing myself to Chris Martin — same age back in uni (still are, really). Now he’s famous, loved, rich… and rides a unicycle. I’m here panicking over teeth and aging eyes.
The body evolves. That’s not a flaw. It’s the whole deal. I’m just trying to keep up and not fall into panic mode every time something creaks.
It still feels messy. But at least I’m not pretending anymore.
